Friday, December 10, 2010

A Lyrical Lady

I have been wanting to illustrate certain lyrics of various songs for quite sometime. The other day I put out a call for certain lyrics or quotes that others would like to see illustrated & got quite a few & with full intention of drawing them, I strayed. I strayed into a self portrait. I always find myself wanting to do self portraits just because I feel I am constantly changing, for better or for worse. It's as if each portrait I do is a different person. It's interesting to me to look at the ones from the past and remember where I was at each time. I have done 5 self portrait drawings/mixed medias to date & one self portrait photography photo that I am proud of. I'm sure there will be more of these till times smooth themselves over to a sensible wave but till then... here you go. In this case, I feel blank and my music defines me. Its there when no one else is. It wipes my tears and creates new ones. It is my lover, my friend, my enemy. It is my world. I wanted to fit a zillion more lyrics & I tried to be choosy with which ones I included but it was very difficult.

Songs & Artists: (Some are covers but this is the version I listened to when I included the lyrics into the piece.)

  • I Wish That I / Cas Haley
  • Who's That Lady? / Curtis Mayfield
  • Rock Me Baby / B.B. King
  • Heard It On The Radio / Hall & Oates
  • Here We Go / Jon Brion
  • Nobody But You / The Black Keys
  • Nrrd Grrl / Werewolf Congress
  • You're A Cad / The Bird & The Bee
  • Sunday Best / Bobbie Gentry
  • I Me Mine / The Beatles
  • Reflections / Atmosphere
  • Go / Common
  • Silence / Kate Earl
  • Sea Of Love / Cat Power
  • Since I Left You / The Avalanches
  • Ain't No Love In the Heart of the City / Bobby Blue Bland
  • Waiting... / City and Colour
  • Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger / Daft Punk
  • Tombstone Blues / Bob Dylan
  • Make Yourself / Incubus
  • Nausea / Contagious
  • Say Yes / Floetry
  • Your Song / Elton John
  • The People / Common
  • Let's Dance / David Bowie
  • Please Send Me Someone To Love / Fiona Apple
  • People Are Strange / The Doors
  • Summer Breeze / Jason Mraz
  • By Any Rules / Jessie Baylin
  • The Rain Song / Led Zeppelin
  • Enjoy The Ride / Morcheeba
  • Devil's Spoke / Laura Marling
  • Don't Wanna Fall In Love / Jane Child
  • Too High / Stevie Wonder
  • Sunday Morning / The Velvet Underground
  • DVNO / Justice
  • I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire / The Ink Spots
  • Kisses For The Misses / Richard Swift
More to come.


Saturday, October 16, 2010

Through the Glass Forest.

This one's for you, Nick. Thank you for always pushing me. :) Everyone else: I hope you enjoy! I haven't been on the photo scene lately & I do admit that these were rushed a bit but impulsive creativity can be a fun recreational thing to do. More to come, I promise. :D Thanks for your help, Jer!


Thursday, September 16, 2010


Basically, I don't have internet where I'm at so I haven't been able to post this but here are recent sketches I've done. Explanations to come later. Enjoy. :)


Friday, September 3, 2010

Sometimes, the World Notices...

I have a story to tell. This is not a personal journal, this is an art journal, but it was such a significant experience in my life at the moment, I had to share.

I walked to the park by myself today. I brought a book I recently bought called, "Creative License: Giving Yourself Permission To Be The Artist You Are". It's one of the most brilliant and inspiring books that I've ever read. I sat in the park in the disgusting heat and just became absorbed in it. I read for about an hour and 25 minutes or so until I decided I should get something cool to drink. I walked to Starbucks, got a beverage, sat down and watched people for a bit. "Stop to learn, learn to stop", as the book says. After a bit, I got up and decided to go home. I walked a bit down the street, minding my own business when I saw this little old man approaching me. He must have been about 5'4 - 5'3, ethnic, gray hair peeking out from under a navy blue baseball cap, walked like a penguin, and was sporting a light blue and white striped t-shirt. I payed no attention, really. All of a sudden, he gently touched my arm and took me by serious surprise. I looked at him, probably in a very defensive manner, and he very kindly said,

"I can see the pain and sorrow in your eyes. Don't worry, it's ending soon. I promise."

And he went on his way without so much as even a second look. My heart was racing. I was so taken aback. I just stood there and stared. I was literally speechless. He left before I could muster anything out or even give a facial reaction beyond a gaping mouth or stunned look.

For that split second where he stared me in the eyes and said those words, I wanted to burst into tears & hug him with all that I was.

I wont ever forget him. Whoever you are... thank you.


Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Etch a Postcard: "How I Dearly Wish I Was Not Here"

Foreword: I usually only post writings like this on my personal livejournal but I decided to share this on my art journal. I find it tragically inspiring.


I am sitting at my desk. It is 5:16 PM. I am feeling a slight breeze push my hair aside and I am wearing my black robe. I can see wild strawberries growing outside my room. The way the sun lights up the plant life and trees outside puts me in a pleasantly calm state. Stevie Wonder sings to me about how he is too high. My mind is engulfed with thoughts of you. I catch myself staring at your photos for quite sometime. The joining of thoughts and emotional & physical longing is almost too much to bare at times. I try to subside these feelings with images of you or our music but... it just makes me miss you more and more. I remember the feeling I felt when I met you that Sunday night. I felt lonely. In every sense of the word. A stinging desire to connect with another human. A connection I have always wanted. I felt sad. I felt thrown aside. I felt alone. I felt overlooked. I felt... my heart felt... like crying.

You were more than I could have ever asked for. Wished for. Hoped for.

You're brilliant. I cannot lie, I am so taken with your lips. Your eyes. Your smile. Gah. It gets me every time. Meeting someone who matches you in countless aspects but differs in just as many qualities and tastes is incredible. Learning. Teaching. They are one in the same of exciting thoughts for me; I get giddy thinking about it, honestly. Music is my world. To be your equal in the appreciation of it and specifically it's jazz & old school genres is I can't begin to explain how fucking good that feels. In fact, I don't have to. Because I know you understand that completely. And Christ, that feels even better, doesn't it? I remember not wanting to get ahead of myself when we first started talking but how could I not? It seems like things get better and better as time passes. A premonition of what's to come, no doubt.

May I tell you a secret?

I have been wanting to share my new life with someone worthwhile for so long. I have always been a curious and adventurous creature and truly hoped I could find another to match my thirst for life and love. And I see that in you, dearest. I hope talk like this doesn't put you off or make you uneasy like we are rushing things... I am not looking to rush anything, I am simply stating my happiness with the quality of your character and the compatibility we have found in one another. I am a lucky girl. You are one of a kind. The potential happiness to be experienced within the company of each other is immeasurable. And that... is amazing. To feel so scared to put yourself out there... yet, confident that you are being shielded from the worst the world has to offer by the best it has to offer.

I apologize if this letter seems as if I am rambling but I have to channel my longing for you somewhere. And my first choice of being with you immediately is unfortunately impossible. God, I miss you. There's no where in this ghastly & stunning world I would rather be than with you, swimming in the sounds of your piano playing & melting into your kisses. That's the truth.

Thank you for creating these feelings in me.

...and for making me ...and my heart... smile again. I adore you. You. You. You. <33333333



Friday, June 4, 2010


My friend Nick IMed me yesterday on AIM and told me he had a challenge for me. I eagerly listened and he proposed to me an idea of a drawing of an astronaut riding an elephant with balloons. I will admit that the idea was a little out there but he said he would love to see it bc it has never been done, thus I gladly obliged him. I asked him if there was a time limit on it and he said around the same time the very next day. So, I sat down today and this is what came out. I'm actually pleased with the elephant but not the astronaut so much. But, it cheered Nick up after a bad day, so what else is better than that? I also think the name is pretty cute. :)

Watercolors on watercolor paper 9x12.


Tuesday, May 25, 2010


So I was taking a bath the other day, listening to music with my headphones on & was completely consumed with my thoughts. I was thinking about my current predicaments in love, life, and finances. The world, politics, the future. My worries were drowning me. In order to sort of release some of that, I decided to do this piece. I know it's impossible to see but the largest word underneath them all is the word LIFE backwards. Obviously to symbolize how backwards I feel my life is right now. Every word is relevant to me in some way. I did type out the list of the words I used in case anyone really was curious enough. If you are, lemme know, and I can indulge you. I really had no idea how to construct an aerial view of a bathtub so I'm a disappointed with that but it is what it is. Everything is packed right now so I didn't have a proper camera to photograph this or scan it (yes, I do have a scanner that I never used bc I was too lazy to unpack it) so camera phone photos will do. India inks & newspaper clippings on watercolor paper 9x12.


Monday, May 24, 2010

Here We Go.

For you, you old so and so. Always.


Friday, May 21, 2010


So I'm just posting some more of the Friend Fotos I have done. Not like it's a lot... just two but I'm also posting the sketches before the colorings. I personally hate the colored versions and prefer the sketches.

I also included a collaboration piece between Toffer Surovec and myself. He's a fantastic writer & I'm illustrating some of his written lines. Check out his site:

Two Friend Fotos are of Lori Hammer & Matthew Stoll. Two of the most beautiful creatures I have ever encountered. More to come soon. I feel a huge swell of art getting ready to spill out onto a canvas soon enough.


Monday, May 3, 2010

Friend Fotos

It's been quite a few months since my last update and one has been looong overdue. I plan to do some free writing on my personal journal either today or tomorrow. Well, anyway, an update has been past due so I thought I'd share some of the things I've been up to. I honestly have felt most of my work has been shit, which is why I haven't posted anything but I recently started a new project worth sharing. I decided to start drawing a personal friend of mine every day, for more practice than anything really. I usually used more than one photo of the person as reference, (I HAD posted reference photos here just so you would have an idea of what the person is SUPPOSED to look like, but blogspot wasn't showing em :( I'll just have to do that on FB, I suppose) I still have a few to do but this is what I got so far:

First person I drew was Alicia:

Next was Nate:

Third was Suanny:

Fourth was Toffer:
Fifth was Nycole:
Next was Scott:
Seventh was Julia:
Eighth was Brandon:

So! There you have it. I could go into the details of each one, like Julia always wears quirky hats, Brandon is always wearing his grey hoodie, Nycole was one of the hardest to draw, Nate plays guitar but I just put the guitar there so I wouldn't have to finish his arm etc etc. But I wont bore you with the details ;) More to come soon!


Friday, February 26, 2010

Big Sisters!

So, Bioshock is undoubtedly one of my fav games of all time. And with Bioshock 2's release, I, of course was in love all over again. If you've never played the first, I highly suggest you get to doing so. The art direction, design, art deco, music, details, era, game play, etc do it for me every time. I must have played the first (no joke) about 9 times or so. And you know what? I ALWAYS found something new in the game I never noticed or skipped past before. Now that the second is out, it has a multiplayer mode, new plasmids, & a deeper look into the world of Rapture. I loved everything the game had to offer, which is not always the case w/ sequels. I played through the Bioshock 2 once already and am still gunning for more. It took me a bit to warm up to the premise and the Big Sisters but now, the Big Sister is one of my fav video game characters. Her design is incredible. If there is a Bioshock 1 and/or 2 art design book... I need it. I decided to do a piece in inks of the Big Sister. It took about 15 min to do, it was just something fun & sketchy looking. I also included a past piece I did of a guy (who, yes, looks like Shaggy, although that wasn't my intent) running from a Big Daddy done in Photoshop about 2 and a half years ago. I think I might do some more fanart in the near future.. until then, I can't wait to play the game(s) again. :)

All Bioshock characters © 2K :)


Thursday, February 25, 2010


I haven't heard the whole album yet but I love the cover art so much! It's inspiring me to do a similar piece... we'll see :) Gosh... it's loooove!


Friday, February 19, 2010


I have literally been tearing my hair out about this photo for almost 24 hours. No matter what I did, it wasn't coming together. What broke my heart the most was that it was supposed to be my "it" shot. I was just about to throw it out when one of my great photographer friends, Steve, showed me a technique and it completely worked! I LOVE YOU, STEVE! :D So there you go, just had to share. Also, I included the colored one in this post because it was taken exactly a year ago from this shoot. Same model. As I was told:

"you definitely stepped up, in terms of shooting locations"

Yerp. Dead trees own bathrooms. XD


Photo Revivals

There's a great spot on the side of the 10 fwy where a huge fire took out a bunch of trees and all that's left are a bunch of blackened, charred tree skeletons. I decided to do a two part series photo shoot. Starting with the "dark side" of the project, if you will. During the editing process, most of the shots from this shoot were extremely disappointing and there wasn't much I could do to make them look the way I wanted. So, here are two of the ones that were salvageable. Still not very happy with either but like a photographer friend of mine, Nick, said,

"Do what-ever you can and that's it, nothing else you can do about it. The shoot is over. If they're not what you want them to be, try harder next time".

He's right. So, maybe the second part of this shoot will be better. Makeup, editing, style, hair, blah blah blah done by yours truly. I do like
the sort of "Alice in Wonderland" feel to this. I'm hoping to exploit that more in part 2. My model for part 1 of the shoot is Alicia Haro. Next part I'll be shooting with my best friend in the world, Lori Hammer. I'd like to do more shoots with more friends and family to help get me back in the mode of photographer so if you want to participate... pls, let me know :) I also spent some time at Amoeba in Los Angeles and was able to shoot Justin Townes Earle during his performance on Feb 10. I think the photo came out decent for what it was worth. Great performance too. I have some great ideas for upcoming photo projects with friends and a possible collaboration w/ my friend Carl, as well (when he gets some time ;D ). When I get money to spare, I'd love to invest in some long awaited better equipment but for now, I'll work with what I have. :) Been meaning to update this blog but just been preoccupied with getting out and reading and all that jazz. It's been nice getting back to my roots, though.



Top lyrics from The Beatles' song, "Blackbird" (obviously). Bottom lyrics are from Lynard Skynard's "Freebird". JUST as I finished this piece, Freebird came on my shuffle so I decided to include it in the piece. This was all impulsive creativity (is creativity really not impulsive?) & I meant for it to have more meaning but I just ended up doing it bc I love the song(s) & wanted to make something new. It coulda been waaay cooler if I took my time & did what I originally planned. Oh well.


Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Vino e Amanti

I had dinner at my aunt's house last night & her place is VERY Venetian themed, which inspired me to create this. As I was sipping my wine, I was taking in all the colors of the Venetian glass around me & really started to miss Venice. I woke up with this image in my mind this morning and just decided to do a piece dedicated to the city & culture. If you've never been... I suggest you do so before you die.

Wine has the grandios power of turning any room/mood/person quite colorful and lively. I happen to be quite enamored w/ all of the incredible masks made in Venice for the carnivale every year... hence the subject wearing one. Venice also happens to be one of the most romantic places on the face of this earth... hence the flowers & part of the title. Yahhhh. :) Again, quality is shit bc of a lack of a proper scanner/camera but it is what it is. I had bigger plans for this piece but it was too late by the time I realized that I had accidentally started my Venice piece on the back of another previous artwork of mine. :( Sad pandas all around. So, I kinda had to just wing it. It has many a flaws but it's from my heart
<3 Perhaps one day, when my skills aren't as sophomoric as they are now, I can revisit this & do Venice better justice. In my defense, I was just trying to do something fun and not get caught up in technicalities. India inks on watercolor paper 9 x 12.


Thursday, January 21, 2010

I Like The Way It Tastes.

This is another self portrait therapeutic piece. I've been struggling with a lot in my life lately, especially myself. I know that just like everyone in this world, there's a good side and a bad side to me. But sometimes, I feel I only have a "good" side to mask the real awful side. I've done a lot of horrible things in my life... maybe moreso than the average person and perhaps, that is why my life is as such. Only in the end of things will I truly know the answers to anything. And maybe not. So, here you have it. I titled this piece 'I Like The Way It Tastes' because I do. It feels good to be a bad person and do bad things, sometimes. Again, sorry for the shit quality photos, don't have a proper camera or scanner atm.
This is actually the second version of this idea, the first looked like this:
The photo is taken at a weird angle that makes the arm look shorter than it is and I fucked up the shadow. I decided I should try a more creative approach anyway. So, the second version is made of cut out pieces of bristol board (everything is actually separate, eye, shirt pocket, hair, skin, eyelash, etc) colored w/ India Inks pasted on 9 x 12 watercolor paper as opposed to the original that was just pencil and black & red ink.

The only good thing depression & reclusive behavior is good for is time to make mediocre products. Better than nothing, I suppose.


Sunday, January 17, 2010

Writings From the Past Pt. IV

One of my good & old friends, Scott, and I have gone through a lot of ups & downs in our friendship. At one time, Scott had feelings for me and attempted to woo me w/ his words. Lucky for him, he happens to be quite the poet. This still makes me smile.

Jenn asked me to continue from the previous free-written...
So, I went off topic and started rhyming about her. This one's for you, Jennifer.
(P.S. The blog title is of the song I listened to partially as I wrote this.)

Just a Free Write
i just want you to know that to me, i think you're beautiful /

a mixture of kelly kapowski and winnie cooper, too /
you're the super glue, that holds this heart of mine together /
and without you in my life, would crumble worse than the city of rome - never /
could i have imagined that this heart of mine would blacken /

by the fact that what we once could have had can no longer happen /
i'm not acting, just rappin, hoping i might be able to show you just a fraction /
of how much i care, my apologies for referencing math and /
know i'm just spittin' some free-written off of the top of my hairpiece /
don't stare please, not like i'd be staring at your derriere, peace! /
i want us to go to a land called disney /
and i hope that you might have a good time with me /
but strictly, understand that i might not remain on consistently good behavior /
you know that i'm not a player, but instead i'm just a rhyme sayer /
a dragon slayer, who wants to get comfortable in your lair ;) /
if you ever wonder "what's scott doing?" know that i'm right there /
right above your left breast, in your heart, in a high chair /
but i'm not no baby, nor am i implying that you would be mine either /
but believe, if we were together, we'd shine through this ether /
i'm not a preacher, but i am a believer,
that things happen for some reason or another /
but don't deny me when i say (in pharell's voice) I JUST WANNA LOVE YA!* /
but be who i am*, i mean no disrespect ma'am /

just know that my heart's not one to fuck with, like the Wu-Tang Clan**

- Scott N. aka Scotty Blaze
July 9th, 2:10 a.m.

* Pharrell's guest vocals in the chorus of Jay-Z's "I Just Wanna Love U"
** The Wu-Tang Clan song "Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthin' To Fuck Wit"

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Another old sketch. Was done quickly & it's quality is also shit bc of my phone but I still like it, for what it's worth. It's not a good sketch, by any means, but was listening to this song in Switzerland while I was alone & it prompted this. Just nonsense. Nonsense, nonsense, nonsense.

Let's go to sleep in Paris,
And wake up in Tokyo.
Have a dream in New Orleans,
Fall in love in Chicago,

Then we can land in the motherland,
Camelback across the desert sand.
Take a train, to Rome, or home,
Brazil, forreal.
Wherever I go she goes.
Wherever I go she goes.

-- "Paris, Tokyo", Lupe fiasco


Internet Dating.

So, my friend Carl & I decided to collaborate and do an art project based upon internet dating. His was way better & I got lazy and never finished this concept. I planned on a doing a different idea but just never had the motivation to do it. Anyway, sorry for the crap quality of a photo, using my phone bc my camera is currently in Chicago :)